Okay everyone, I have a question for you.
How do you become comfortable and accepting of yourself?
Like this is a legit question I am asking. Or are you, like me, not comfortable or accepting of who you are?
You guys all know that I have struggled with my weight pretty much my whole life. And it stinks.
For those who have been following me for a few months know that I was able to lose a little weight by using weight watchers.
However, I have gained it back … PLUS more. This is an all new high for me and it kind of scares me.
Like I never ever thought I would be this much. I look back at pictures of me when I was in high school and even college and I think WOW! I looked good! Like yeah, I wasn’t skinny skinny, but I looked good! But in the moment I felt huge, disgusting, and fat.
I wish I looked like that again.
The problem though … is that so far it hasn’t scared me enough to do anything TOO drastic to change it.
Like what do I need to do to actually change?
First of all, I know I need to lose weight to just be in the healthy weight range. So, how can I learn to accept me as I am, but also have the strength to change?
Like I want to learn to love my body as it now, but also work towards having a better body.
The problem is the work.
Getting fit is so much work.
I know that for some of you, going to the gym every day is a no brainer. That eating healthy is natural to you. But for me … IT ISN’T.
I LOVE food. All kinds of food.
And I hate any kind of exercise.
Here is the other problem … you might be saying, well just go to the gym. Take it slow and do easy exercises. The problem is that I am so self conscious about my weight and my body that I don’t even want to show my face in the gym. I would worry about people staring and looking at me.
I am afraid of people judging me.
I am letting others keep me from achieving something I want.
I am letting myself keep me away from achieving something I want.
How do you stop that?
How do you learn to block everyone else out and only focus on your own thoughts?
What I really need is a personal fitness and health trainer. I need to go to some camp for like a few weeks or something where all we do is exercise and eat healthy haha. Like all those different shows they have. I would hate it, but it would do something.
What’s crazy is that gaining weight is sooooo easy.
But losing it takes like five times longer! You have to do so much more work.
And because losing weight takes A LOT of time … like in order to lose a lot of weight, you need to have patience because it takes months to accomplish.
I often get tired of it and quit.
So, I want to change my mindset about how I feel right now. But I also want to change.
It’s kind of interesting how much we complain about something, yet never do anything about it.
I know I am not the only one! haha.
I am going to be starting a part time job by the way! Monday is my first day. I will just be helping out my cousin for 4 hours a day from 2-6 so she can run some errands and have help with the kids.
But … that also means I will have up until about 1pm to work out. So … maybe I can motivate myself to work out a little before work each day. Maybe. haha.
I think I just need to get back on weight watchers again and see what happens yet again. I had a blog for that when I was losing weight. Maybe I will need to start updating that again as well. My weight loss blog is titled Here’s To a New Me. My last post was in March. So I will update it right now with my new info.
Thank you everyone for being so supportive!!! I appreciate it!
Do you have any insecurities? Do you let them get in the way of doing things? How do you overcome them? Comment below.